[Text]

[tenbackpockets]

[Guess who's been keeping out of whatever's been going on here? This guy! Naturally he'd like to keep doing that, but there's a thing or two that needs to be addressed. Not the kidnapping, he's been around enough to know that no one has answers to that.]

Hey, my name's Robert Epps, formerly NEST (Non-biological Extraterrestrial Species Treaty), and I'm one of the human visitors on your "glorious" homeworld. Now that we've got introductions outta the way, I've got one request for all you Cybertronians:

Please be careful 'round our water! You Cybertronians ain't using it, and we humans sort of need it to survive. I can't remember the last time it rained, so our resources totally aren't limitless. Wish we had some water purification going, because I don't think it'll mean anything good if there was some kinda energon contamination.

To my fellow humans: This world is bigger than us and I think we should stick together. I don't think we're doing ourselves any good by running around and doing our own thing. Besides, I haven't talked to another human in a while, and that's getting a little depressing.

Also you aliens should think up some more emotes, because these are the stupidest goddamn things I've seen in a while.

[He refuses to use them.]